All women are equal, or are they?

Every year around this time, I ask myself why there needs to be a Women’s Day. Mother’s Day, yes, but Women’s Day? I don’t understand it. At risk of being cliché, I ask why there is no Men’s Day. Or is it that the rest of the days are for the men, and only this one day is set apart to remember the woman too because, women exist too.

It is either that, or there is a lesson or message to be learned. A lesson of integrity, respect and…I believe, it’s the women who need this lesson more than the men. If the women treated each other the way men treat each other, they would be in a better bargaining position for those women things.

Men recognise each other as equals on an instinctive level, and accord each other the recognition that the other deserves. This might seem abstract and even confusing, since men are not exactly known for being all comrady with each other, until you realise that they treat women even worse.

Men work with each other to get things done, while they treat women as a means to an end. Women can hardly say the same. Few women have managed to establish long working relationships with fellow women. In fact, left to their own devices, over a long run, women are more likely to tear each other up than agree to get something done. Take my darling woman Elle and the house maid.
They have simply failed to make things work. And it’s not only this maid, there has been a long line of them, each being dismissed for some obscure reason that I was never aware of. Until the last minute when we tried a male house help, who she was terrified of. So, we had to get another female help and fire the boy for no reason.
Now, the issue is that Elle thinks the maid does not respect her enough! I don’t even know what to make of this statement. I don’t know how she gauges the amount of respect that is accorded to her, so, I keep quiet, stay out of their way and watch.
The maid treats Elle ok; she is polite but firm, and I like that in her, since Elle can be a bit overbearing. So, Elle and the maid are always circling each other like an animal being watchful of its natural enemy. Elle wants to get more out of the maid; probably she wants her to treat her like she treats me. Which would be ok if Elle didn’t behave like “too much of a woman”? Don’t crucify me for that statement; I learned it from a woman.
I treat the maid with respect, recognising her as a fully qualified human being, and establishing a mutual beneficial, healthy co-habitation relationship with her. Elle treats the maid as “another woman”, and at every turn, tries to prove that she is the better woman. I look at the two of them and wait for one to clean my clothes, and the other to love me. I’m not sexist, or chauvinist, I’m simply analysing the situation in real time. So ladies, happy Women’s Day, but please, try to wish it to each other as well. And mean it.

-eugenemugisha@gmail.com